How to get closure so you can start healing

I've been there kicking, screaming, and crying, figuring out what went wrong and how things could have been better – caught up in the moment I've wanted to have a closure talk with my Ex. I've even learned a valuable lesson after allowing my emotions to get the best of me.  

After a breakup, I was the girl who needed to have the closure talk. I learned closure talks do not work – they make things worse.   

The top thing most women want to do after a breakup is reconnecting with their inner power. Reaching out to your EX puts them in a position of POWER. When you reach out to them after the relationship has ended, you make them feel like they have control over you, your emotions, and your ability to heal – no one should have this amount of power over you.  

When people are in a position of power, it puts you in a position to be taken advantage of or mistreated – You are too good for both.  

I get it – It's hard to accept that the relationship is over, but the truth is you saw the writing on the wall before the relationship ended, and you are not going to find resolve by rehashing what went wrong with your Ex.   

Breakup recovery is an inside job. There is only one person capable of helping you move forward, and that person is you.   

Get on the road to healing now by releasing the questions running through your minds.  

You can do this by starting a purging journal. The purging journal is a daily journal entry you will complete that will allow you to do a complete brain dump of the things that are cluttering your mind.   

Get a pen and open a new page in your journal to start now. Next, write down every question, thought, or concern you have about your Ex, the relationship, the hurt, the pain, things that went wrong, set back, and your greatest fears. Give yourself a week to expand on your entry – do not stop writing until you get it all out.   

At the end of the week, go to the top of the page and write the date, and at the bottom of the page, write the date exactly one year from the date at the top of your page.  

Finally, spend twice the time in prayer or meditation as you would spend worrying – ask God to give you peace and clarity concerning your written items. Most important, ask him to provide you with a new direction to fulfill your purpose.   

In one year, revisit your journal entry; this will be a time for you to reflect on your progress throughout the year and make a note of the lessons learned from your journey. 

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