Getting back to dating after being hurt

The thought of opening up to love again after you’ve been hurt can be very scary. When you've invested everything into a relationship you feel depleted it hurts to see it fail. When you get disappointed, the natural tendency is to want to give up. Giving up feels safe because we block ourselves from loving again, but we miss out the opportunity to meet someone truly amazing to experience life with.  

Here are a few things you can do to prepare to get ready to love again: 

Embrace the changes life brings and keep moving forward 

We go through life experiencing many pains, struggles, and trials. Some of our life challenges feel way bigger and more powerful than we are, but the truth is, they are not.  

Be willing to accept the pain and feel it. Evaluate your experience and consider some of the valuable lessons you can take away from the relationship. Sometimes in life we will experience things such as heartbreak that will leave a bad taste in our mouth; however, there are always valuable lessons lying just beneath the surface of all the bad things. 

Some of the things you can consider are the other persons moral, values, and habits and how they impacted your ability to experience happiness. These things are important to note, as you should pay close attention to these things when considering a future partner. 

Remember that you are powerful 

Heartbreak can be messy. When love comes to an end people are typically in an emotional state. If there is one thing worse than having your emotions all over the place following heartbreak, it is trying to gain power and control of your life in the midst of everything falling apart. 

Healing from heartbreak is a process that cannot begin until you are able to feel good about who you are, now that you are single. 

There are three things you must do immediately to reclaim self-respect and to boost your confidence. 

  • Setting clear boundaries with “no contact” is an essential step to regaining power and control of your life following heartbreak. You cannot continue to give yourself in a way that you have done during the relationship and start your healing journey. When it is time to let go – you must completely let go, because holding on to YOU is of greater importance. 
  • To break free from the past you must make peace with your hurt. Learning to let go by being able to forgive both yourself and your partner is an important step in your healing journey. Forgiveness does not mean that you accept and agree with the past hurt/pain, it simply sets you free from the past and allows you to take back your life and move forward. 
  • You want to meet your next partner when you are the best version of you. Take this time to work on your health and fitness goals. You can also spruce up your wardrobe, get a new hair style and take some classes. Think about all the things you did to get around to doing during your relationship and start doing them now. 

Release baggage and get your feeling in neutral 

When a relationship ends on a bad note you might notice that you are still feel weighed down with negative feelings, emotions and memories. This is what’s known as relationship baggage, and it can block you from moving forward. 

It is super important to recognize that you are emotionally injured. You will need some time to start working on you to get mental clarity and to move into a better space emotionally. Healing after heartbreak may include working with a coach or therapist, but the mental freedom gained is priceless. Getting support along your healing journey will help dump old baggage, shift your feeling into neutral and break free to live the life you deeply desire to live. 

One of the most important indication that you are ready to move forward in a new relationship is the ability to have neutral feeling for your ex. Having neutral feelings means you are free from all feelings and emotions you’ve experienced at some point for your EX and your feelings are totally neutral – you no longer want to be with them and you are no longer have negative feeling towards them.  

At this point you are totally content with who you are and where you are. 

Relax and enjoy reconnecting  

When you are in the waiting room you may begin to wonder, just how long will you be there. The reality is none of us will truly know how just how long our wait will be. This is a great time to continue focusing on your and achieving all of your single goal and enjoying the single life. The harsh true is everything will shift to couples' goals shortly after the right one comes along - makes the most of doing anything and everything your heart desires.

Now is the time to be free 

Now is the time to be selfish 
Now is the time to consider only how you feel 
Now is the time to be unapologetically you 
You are now free  
You are free to write the next chapter of your life as bright and bold as you choose 
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