How to stop feeling overwhelmed by the fear of being alone after heartbreak
Heartbreak is as painful as stepping on a sharp needle. Most people will stay in unhappy relationships because it’s harder to walk away due to the fear of being alone. Even if your partner is not treating you right, staying with them will likely feel like the safest option.
The unfortunate part is that if your partner doesn’t change, you will end up feeling hurt and lonely in the relationship. So, the one thing that you fear the most will also follow you to your relationship. It’s normal to feel worried when you think of stepping into the unknown. It’s scary to say the least.
But not all hope is lost. Luckily, what you will be gaining from leaving a relationship that only caused you pain is the chance to embrace life and finally make your own rules. This is your chance to take back control of what is happening in your life.
So, if you have already broken up with your partner, then you need to read through this article. And hey, the best parts of your life are still yet to come! All you have to do is find the ideal way to overcome your fear. With that in mind, let’s take a look at some of the best ways to overcome the feeling of being lonely after a breakup.
Tell someone what you are going through
“A problem shared is half solved”. As much as you’ll need some time to sort out what’s happening in your life, it’s always a good idea to talk to someone about it. However, you may end up feeling embarrassed about the breakup so you should only talk to people you trust.
There’s also a chance that you will end up feeling stressed imagining how other people will look at you once they realized that you’ve broken up with your spouse. But, at some point, you will have to let someone in. By talking to someone, you will feel less burdened by the effects of your breakup.
As I said earlier, you will still need some time on your own to sort out what is happening. Regardless, we all need some interaction with other people, it helps us feel alive. To be transparent, you will have to interact with other people to overcome the fear of loneliness.
If you get an invite to attend any party, you should go. Even if you are not into parties, find a group meeting that you can attend. Without a doubt, due to grief, you may be reluctant to go. But trust me, once you get there, you will feel much better.
Remember to keep the expectation of the event as low as possible. You don’t necessarily have to be in a party mode. All you have to do is just show up. Yes, just go to the event. Try staying there for at least half an hour and gauge how you feel afterward. Then you can either decide on leaving or staying.
Make sure when you attend any event, you have a means of leaving at any time. When you finally get home, you can pat yourself on the back for just attending the event. I know it was not an easy task.
Create a social schedule
Take a minute and map out when your mind and heart are most prone to have an emotional challenge. Whether it’s on the weekends, holidays, or even summer days, plan on how you can help yourself get over these days. The best way to spend your weekends is maybe by visiting with family even if you have to do this virtually. That way, you won’t be alone.
You can also relax at home on the couch and catch up on Netflix. Or you can even choose to catch-up with your college friends over the phone. The key is to be proactive during this time.
Have Like-minded friends
The good thing about your breakup even if it doesn’t feel like it is: you now have the freedom you need to do whatever you want. Instead of crying into your pillow all day long, find something that can help you fill that emotional void in your heart. More importantly, look for a hobby that can help you fill in your time with fun, entertaining activities, and an opportunity to connect with people.
What you need to remember is that there’s no rush of finding your next partner. You have all the time in the world to do that. Right now, just focus on healing yourself and spending as much time as possible having fun instead of crying.
Talk to a professional
Lastly, you can choose to talk to a professional. Chatting with someone doesn’t mean you are weak. Truth be told, breakups can emotionally attack your body, mind and your will to continue with your day to day activities. If left untreated, this feeling will eventually spill into all the parts of your life and in the end, it might have some adverse effects on you.
The fact that you can even wake up in the morning after a breakup is a true miracle. On top of that, breakups can easily lead to depression and anxiety challenges. When you get to talk to an expert, he/she will recommend the best way forward.
With the right support, you will have a smooth transition. But that doesn’t mean that the pain of your heartbreak will instantly go away. Heartbreaks are painful experiences that will stay with you almost all through your life. Regardless, you need to remember the lessons you learned about heartbreak.
Before you go…
The human heart is one of the strangest body parts. Aside from pumping blood, it also can make you feel lost in the case of a heartbreak. And that is why you need to take your time and find the best way to heal. Nothing is easy and you shouldn’t expect your recovery journey to be any different. Regardless, with the right motivation and ideas, you will learn how to love again.
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