Everything You'll Ever Need to Know About Self Love


Not until recently did I realize that self-love is one of the most overlooked aspects of life. We always focus on working hard to afford a better or luxurious life experience, but we easily forget about ourselves. Like, how many times do you remember to take time out to learn more about yourself? Or better yet, do you even understand what self-love is?  

We all have ways through which we feel love. And that's why the self-love language must be a part of your life. You need to understand your self-love language. That said, the five love languages that exist today include:   

  • Physical touch  
  • WOA (Words of Affirmation)  
  • Receiving Gifts  
  • Acts of Service  
  • Quality Time  

Physical Touch  

Simply put, physical touch is a nonverbal love language that makes you feel cherished. If this is your language, you feel at peace when someone does things to your physical body, such as a body massage and holding hands. In short, you feel love when you start to focus on your external health.   

What you need to understand is that physical touch doesn't necessarily lead to intimacy. All in all, in a relationship, physical contact is all about timing. Without a doubt, even the most subtle gesture of affection at the right moment will speak volumes if you love for physical touch as a way of self-love.   

Take time and analyze how you feel whenever you are doing something that involves your physical body's health and wellness. If that can lighten your mood even on those incredibly hard days, physical touch is your self-love language.  

Words of Affirmation  

This one is my personal favorite. Especially if you get to deal with depression and anxiety as often as I do, building yourself with gentle words "Everything is going to be okay' or 'You got this' will go a long way in helping you get through the day.   

And I know I'm not the only one who loves to identify with words of affirmation in any relationship, whether with myself or other people. I love hearing compliments, and just knowing that everything I'm doing is on the right track gives me peace of mind.   

These words help me to not only feel loved but also appreciated. And I bet that's the same case for you too if journaling about affirmations every morning is your thing. You are your biggest cheerleader, so be positive about how you talk about yourself to others. Your words will build you up, so use them!   

When it comes to affirmations, there are a couple of ideas that you can consider. Some of them include:   

  • Writing yourself a love letter if you are having a bad day. Convince your mind that you are okay, and everything will fall into place.   
  • Keeping an affirmations folder on your computer or smartphone  
  • Talking to someone you love  
  • Reciting your daily Mantra  

Receiving Gifts  

When I first came across the idea of self-love languages, I was like, who doesn't love buying themselves gifts anyway? So, I immediately checked off the box that receiving gifts is my number one language of love. However, later on, I realized that receiving gifts goes far beyond the ideal of self-gifting.   

When it comes to receiving gifts, it doesn't have to involve expensive purchases or spending thousands of dollars. You will feel more loved and uplifted by the simple things. What do I mean? You will be excited by celebrating yourself with a piece of chocolate for getting through the day's work. Or you were gifting yourself a vacation to your dream destination for accomplishing a particular milestone in your life. In short, you are in love with rewards after making specific milestones in your life.   

Some of the ideas you might consider;  

  • Buying yourself something you've been putting aside  
  • Finally using something you've been putting aside for special occasions  
  • Buying yourself a new set of lingerie  

Acts of Service  

The language that always seems to have a bad rap (of course, aside from receiving gifts, which is not about being materialistic by the way) is Acts of Service. That's because it mainly describes people who feel more loved when they come home to dinner on the table and also a promise of a foot rub as a desert or something close to that. If this sounds like something you'd love to have, then this is your love language.   

But here's the bad part: Acts of service don't necessarily mean that you are a lazy nag or high maintenance. What it truly means is that actions speak louder to your heart than words; that's not bad.   

At its core, this love language is all about a demonstration of your love. Typically, saying, 'I love you' doesn't have a lot of impact than doing some of the actions that describe your love. What's more, if someone can recognize what you do for love and want to jump in and help you out, that's the true definition of real love.   

Quality Time  

Quality time is another one of my favorite self-love languages. You deserve time and space to be yourself and explore who you are and everything you like. If your quality time is your self-love language, you may benefit from taking long nature walks. This time will allow you to reflect experience many life-changing epiphanies aha moments. 

Spending quality time with yourself doesn't necessarily mean cleaning out your closet, laundry, or checking off a couple of things off your to-do list. It simply means being present and getting to know more about yourself. Just identify things that excite you when you're alone, the same way, some things spark your heart when alone with your partner.   

Things like:   

  • Watching something you had added on your Netflix list 
  • Going on a coffee date or cocktail date alone without having to worry about the pressure of life 
  • Picking up a new book  
  • Trying out guided meditation  

Before You Go  

When it comes to love languages, no one else can best describe how you feel better than yourself. Take time to understand what makes your heart sing and what it would feel like to experience affection. Having a great relationship with you will help you better communicate how you genuinely desire to be loved by your current or future partner.   



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